


Secret Admirer

by A Magiluna Stormwriter (ariestess)



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Cheesy Come Ons, F/F, Language of Flowers, Pre-Relationship, Secret Admirer, Threesome - F/F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-03-06
Packaged: 2018-09-28 15:33:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10128992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariestess/pseuds/A%20Magiluna%20Stormwriter
Summary: Regina keeps getting dirty love poems sent to her with flowers, but no name is ever attached. And she's torn over who might be sending them.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [missemmyd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/missemmyd/gifts).



> Date Written: 5 March 2016  
> Word Count: 2874  
> Written for: [](http://ouat-ff-xchange.livejournal.com/profile)[**ouat_ff_xchange**](http://ouat-ff-xchange.livejournal.com/) Winter 2017  
>  Recipient: [](http://www.archiveofourown.org/users/missemmyd/profile)[](http://www.archiveofourown.org/users/missemmyd/)**missemmyd**  
>  Summary: Regina keeps getting dirty love poems sent to her with flowers, but no name is ever attached. And she's torn over who might be sending them.  
> Spoilers: Canon divergent AU taking place post-S4, but everything we know about all of these characters is up for grabs.  
> Warnings: No standard warnings apply.  
> Website: ShatterStorm Productions – Doggie Duo  
> Link to: http://bdkk.shatterstorm.net/  
> Archive: ShatterStorm Productions & AO3 only…all others ask for permission & we'll see…  
> Feedback: Constructive criticism is always welcome.
> 
> Author’s Disclaimer: "Once Upon a Time," the characters, and situations depicted are the property of Adam Horowitz, Edward Kitsis, Kitsis/Horowitz, and ABC Studios. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes. Previously unrecognized characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. This site is in no way affiliated with "Once Upon a Time," ABC, or any representatives of the actors.
> 
> Author’s Notes: I think my recipient wanted something a little funnier than what happened here, and I did intend that, but the story decided to go a little... angstier. Oops?
> 
> The three cheesy dirty love poems came from [here](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/63894888445743521/).
> 
> Dedication: My muses, as usual…
> 
> Beta: [](http://theonlyspl.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://theonlyspl.livejournal.com/)**theonlyspl**

They start appearing on Monday morning. Regina steps into her office to find a bouquet of yellow chrysanthemums and white carnations waiting on her desk. She settles in her chair, leaning in to inhale the gentle perfume, and reaches for the card. The _Game of Thorns_ logo is on the envelope, as well as her name written in looping handwriting that she recognizes as Belle's, after remembering the young woman is helping out her father in an attempt at reconciliation.

She slips the card from the envelope, relishing the thought that Maleficent is sending her flowers. She knows her former lover is quite knowledgeable in the meanings of flowers, having taught it to an eager young queen a lifetime ago.

"You're not being that secret of an admirer, Mal," she murmurs.

Clearly their reunion has sparked some rekindling of their relationship. Not that she would fight it, but there's also the fact that she and Emma have been getting closer ever since the culmination of that fateful missing year when she thought she'd never see the blonde or their son again. A small, secretive smile tugs at the corners of her lips as she considers the possibility that she could have two suitors vying for her affections.

And then she reads the card:

> _"Roses are red_  
>  _Violets are blue_  
>  _Guess what, my bed_  
>  _Has room for two"_

A rather undignified snort echoes in the room, followed by laughter. That definitely sounds like Maleficent. On the other hand, it also sounds like something Emma would say. And Emma would choose yellow and white flowers because of that whole light magic Savior thing. Using Belle's handwriting is just plain cruel.

Regina shakes her head, returns the card to its envelope before slipping it into her purse, then sets the flowers to her left on the desk to start her day. Tonight she can work on figuring out this little mystery.

*****

"So tell me, Regina," Maleficent says as she settles on a stool at the island that night. "Wherever did you get these lovely flowers?"

"I'm not exactly sure. I apparently have a secret admirer who is going to great lengths to make sure I'm clueless as to their identity."

She watches Maleficent's face as the blonde gently strokes the flowers, but nothing is given away. Of course, she wouldn't make this easy on Regina. Unless it's not actually her. Regina is pulled from her thoughts by the warmth of a hand on hers. She relishes the extra heat that dragon fire exudes, even in human form.

"How will you figure it out?"

Regina shrugs and squeezes Maleficent's hand. "I don't know. I suppose it depends on whether or not my secret admirer decides to out himself or herself. I mean, the sentiment written on the card was rather straightforward about what they want. But how can they expect to get what they want if they don't have the courage to tell me directly?"

"You think it might be a man, Regina?" Maleficent shifts to lace their fingers together, and Regina does nothing to stop her. "I thought you'd given up on men after that disaster with the thief."

"I haven't so much given up on them as I just don't care, I suppose. If someone comes along that makes my heart speed up, then I'll consider them." Regina shrugs and glances down at their intertwined hands, relishing the contact.

"So is Swan coming over for dinner?"

"No, she and Henry are eating with Snow and David. It's just you and me tonight."

Maleficent purrs at that. "Good. I like having you all to myself."

And Regina begins to suspect that this is her secret admirer.

*****

By Wednesday, there are two more bouquets of flowers delivered with cards written by Belle. Each bouquet goes home with her, minus one perfect bloom from each that stays in a vase on her desk as a reminder of what her secret admirer is trying to tell her. The vase currently holds the yellow chrysanthemum and white carnation from Monday, a pink carnation and daffodil from Tuesday, and a hibiscus and an orchid from Wednesday. 

On Tuesday, Regina is certain that Emma is her secret admirer, calling on her Charming genetics of chivalry and gratitude. But Wednesday's hibiscus and orchid have her leaning toward Maleficent again, reminders of the multiple comments on her beauty, inside and out.

The only problem with it being Maleficent is that the little rhyme definitely sounds more like Emma.

> _"Twinkle twinkle little star_  
>  _We can do it in a car"_

Emma and Henry are coming home for dinner, bringing young Neal with them so that his parents can have a night alone. Regina can't deny the jealousy that they get a night alone and she doesn't. Then again, she doesn't exactly have anyone to spend a night with anyway. She's still not sure what's going on with her two blonde suitors, but she is positive it's one of them sending her these gifts. Perhaps at dinner, she'll find a way to feel up -- _out_ \-- Emma as to whether or not she's the one.

*****

"Mom, I'm gonna take Neal upstairs with me, okay?"

Regina smiles at Henry. "All right, but make sure you let him sleep. As tempting as it is to wind him up before returning him to his parents, I remember long nights like that with you."

"I'll be good. I'm just gonna finish my homework and maybe read a little bit until it's time to take him home again."

"I'll text you when it's time, kid."

"Okay, Ma."

And then Henry heads upstairs with his sleeping uncle, leaving Regina and Emma alone in the kitchen to finish cleaning up after dinner. They work in an easy silence, already attuned to each other's rhythms after nearly two years of these family dinners for Henry's sake. But when did it stop being _solely_ for him and more for the two of them, as well?

"Somebody's been spoiling you with flowers," Emma finally says, just a hint of smugness in her tone. "How do you rate?"

Regina can't help the delighted smile lighting up her face. "I don't know. I just wish I knew who to thank for them. The meanings of the flowers seem at odds with the poems left with them, and I'd really like to know who my secret admirer is, if only so I can figure out the connection."

Emma smiles and gently hip checks Regina. "What if it's someone that you don't feel the same way about?"

"I guess I'd thank them and gently let them down. But I think I have it narrowed down to a short list right now. And there's not a single person on my list that would be let down, gently or otherwise."

"Really?" 

Emma's voice cracks just the tiniest bit. Regina chuckles, knowing now that Emma is involved somehow. She turns to grab the bottle of wine opened for dinner, as well as her glass, and motions for Emma to do the same.

"Come on, Swan, let's go sit by the fire and chat."

*****

On Thursday, the flowers throw Regina for a loop. The fact that she's also nursing one hell of a hangover from the wine and cider with Emma the night before doesn't help matters at all. If the Savior divulged anything, Regina unfortunately doesn't remember it. But she _does_ remember an accidental kiss that led to a lovely little make out session on the couch in her study. Does that mean that Emma is her secret admirer after all? She should be thrilled that she's potentially figured out the mystery, but there's a part of her that feels like something is missing still…

Hyacinths for sincerity, the promise characteristic of apple blossoms, and the plea equally inherent in forget-me-nots could mean either of her potential suitors. There's a part of her that wants to just call them both to her office and confront them with her suspicions. But what if she's wrong? Choosing to continue pondering this a little longer, she heads over to Granny's for a cup of strong coffee. 

Heading out of Town Hall, she sees Maleficent exiting the Sheriff's Station and starts to raise her hand to wave the woman down, wondering why she'd be visiting Emma. Maybe they can get a coffee together and Regina can find out. But that idea quickly grinds to a halt as she watches Emma following right behind her, calling out her name. Regina braces herself for the potential fight ahead, knowing that Maleficent's centuries of experience will crush any raw power Emma has. But instead of fighting, Maleficent pulls Emma into a tight hug, lips moving as she seems to be comforting rather than escalating anger in any way. It takes a couple moments of this before Emma pulls back to hesitantly smile at her. And then any thought of getting coffee completely leaves Regina's mind as she watches her former lover kissing the other mother of her child. 

Without hesitation, Regina turns around and emotionally barricades herself in her office for the remainder of the day. Her secretary knows better than to let anyone through the door, and she prefers it that way. A part of her wants to destroy all of the flowers and notes, but cooler heads prevail and she decides that she needs to confront the two of them about what's going on. Just not tonight.

*****

Friday morning dawns gloomy with heavy wind and rain. Regina doesn't want to see another bouquet of flowers on her desk. She'd prefer spending the day in bed, sleeping off her disappointment. She's sure that both Emma and Maleficent are worried about her because of the last minute cancellation of plans last night. Instead, Regina sent Henry to stay with his grandparents and curled up in her study with a bottle of her cider. 

When she steps into her office, there is a larger than normal vase of red and yellow tulips accented with deep green ivy. It takes every ounce of willpower not to throw it against the far wall and burn the card she knows is with it. Regina takes a deep breath and reads the card, once again written by Belle.

> _"Row, row, row your boat_  
>  _Gently down the stream_  
>  _Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily_  
>  _I can make you scream"_

The crude attempts at seduction no longer seem as titillating as they were before yesterday. As she slips the card back into its envelope, she sees something on the back. Curiosity gets the better of her.

> _"You are no doubt curious who I am,_  
>  _and I think it's time for you to find out._  
>  _Meet me tonight in front of the library_  
>  _at nine on the dot. Dress nicely, but_  
>  _comfortably. I promise it'll be worth_  
>  _your time. Please?"_

She doesn't want to know anymore, but she also knows herself well enough that she can't live without an explanation. Accepting the fact that she's going to find out whether she wants to or not, Regina picks out one of each tulip and a bit of the ivy to add to her office vase. Mind made up, she turns her attention to her work, grateful for the finance reports to pore over.

Not long before lunch, there's a knock at her door. Before she can get up to answer it, the door opens to reveal Maleficent standing there in that grey skirt suit that she prefers. Blue eyes study her intently, worry and annoyance warring for dominance.

"What do you want, Mal?" Regina asks wearily. "I'm rather busy today."

"I wanted to make sure you were all right after last night's dismissal. You've ignored all other attempts at communication, so I thought I'd do it the old fashioned way."

Sighing softly, Regina shakes her head and closes her eyes. "I'm fine. It's just a nasty headache that seems to be lingering."

"You could have told me, Regina. I could have tried that massage technique that used to work. I remember how your headaches can be."

"I was too sensitive last night to accept anyone's touch, no matter how gentle or familiar." It's not exactly a lie, but it's not entirely the truth either. "It's probably related to the storm and will ease when it passes."

She can feel Maleficent's hard, calculating gaze on her, but doesn't meet the other woman's eyes. The soft grunt of reluctant approval is enough to ease a minute bit of the strain from Regina's muscles.

"And you're still not feeling any better, I see," is the soft reply. "Are you even up for dinner tonight? Henry and Emma promised to teach me how to make pizza."

"I'm not sure. The three of you can always use my kitchen, even if I don't join you at all. It's easily big enough and I have everything you could need."

*****

She does end up joining them for dinner, but doesn't eat or interact much. She keeps staring at Maleficent and Emma, wondering if they're going to say anything about what she saw, despite the fact that they don't even know she saw them.

By eight, Henry and Emma have left to take Henry to the Tillman house for a sleepover. Maleficent stays and helps with the last minute clean up in the kitchen. It's clear to Regina that her former lover doesn't plan on leaving, and she's not sure how she'll be able to get out for her meeting. But by about eight forty-five, she finally leaves and allows Regina the chance to change for her rendezvous by the library. Leather skirt and jacket over a silky shirt, all black to match the knee-high boots, and she poofs to her destination.

The rain has stopped, but the wind is still relatively strong and whips her hair around. She hopes that this is worth the snarls that will be evident later on. Closing her eyes, she leans against the wall next to the door. She can hear David's pickup slowly drive by twice, and wonders if she's been wrong all this time. But when the truck doesn't stop, combined with the brief sensation of Emma's magic, she is confused once again.

"Looks like it's just the two of us," comes a familiar voice.

Regina feels the sting of tears, but refuses to let them fall. "No, it's not. Your girlfriend's circled the block at least twice already since I got here, and it sounds like she's coming up for trip number three."

"My g--" The shock is real in Maleficent's voice. "What do you mean?"

"Save it, Mal, I--" Regina's words cut off as she opens her eyes to see Maleficent holding a yellow chrysanthemum, red tulip, and yellow tulip in her hands. The blonde's fingers nervously twist at the stems, something Regina's never seen her do before. "What's going on here?"

Before Maleficent can answer, she lifts her head with a tentative smile that doesn't reach her eyes, looking over Regina's shoulder. In that moment, Regina realizes she doesn't hear the engine any longer, so she turns her head to follow Maleficent's gaze. Still wearing the same clothes as before, but with one of her ubiquitous knit caps on her head, Emma comes walking toward them with the same trio of flowers clutched in her gloved fist.

Regina leans harder against the wall and stares back and forth between the two women boxing her in, confusion making her head hurt even more. "I-- I don't understand. What are you doing?"

"Hoping you won't kill us for approaching you like this," Maleficent says in that infinitely patient tone she often used with Regina in the past. "We felt it was the best way to--"

"To what?"

"What do these flowers mean, Regina? Surely you remember what I taught you all those years ago."

"I know what they mean," she snaps. "I'm not sure what declarations of being hopelessly in love by a secret admire-- Wait! Why do you both have them?"

"Because it was all from both of us," Emma says softly, the tone reminiscent of her very first words to Regina all those years ago.

"I don't understand," Regina whispers as she accepts the flowers given to her. Without thought, she lifts them to her face, inhaling their scent.

"I think you do, Regina. Emma and I have mostly reconciled our differences because of you. We both think you deserve to be happy and loved."

"And we're both ready to give you that."

"But-- But I saw you kiss her yesterday, Mal. I don't understand."

"We will explain everything in a bit, once we're firmly ensconced in your study before the fire with glasses of your cider in hand. But before we can do that, Emma and I need to know if you're willing to give this a shot. The three of us, I mean."

While Maleficent is far subtler than Emma at schooling her emotions, they both look incredibly earnest and hopeful. Regina knows how she feels for each woman. Knowing now that they both feel the same for her is both terrifying and comforting. Regina takes a deep breath and smiles, turning to meet each of their gazes.

"I'm willing to give it a shot if you are."

**Author's Note:**

> The meanings of the flowers, gathered from [this site](http://aboutflowers.com/flower-a-plant-information-and-photos/meanings-of-flowers.html), are as follows:
> 
> Yellow Chrysanthemum - secret admirer  
> White Carnation - remembrance  
> Pink Carnation - gratitude  
> Daffodil - chivalry  
> Hibiscus - delicate beauty  
> Orchid - delicate beauty  
> Hyacinth - sincerity  
> Forget-Me-Not - remember me forever  
> Apple Blossom - promise  
> Red Tulip - declaration of love  
> Yellow Tulip - hopelessly in love  
> Ivy - fidelity


End file.
